Archive | October, 2011

Living Paradox

27 Oct

Being a last child is a strange pull between self-isolation, and a desire for attention. We are a paradox. While I’m not a psychologist, or a family counselor, I think I’ve been able to determine how these aspects developed in my childhood:

1. Older Sister/First Child—Parents have never done this before, try hard to be strict and make sure the child does not become a delinquent. Last child watches parent/child battles from the sidelines, attention is focused on oldest child primarily. Last child begins acting out for attention. I still remember a battle between my sister and parents about whether she could watch a PG-13 movie, Austin Powers: Goldmember. (She was 15)

2. Parents Give Up— By the time I reach the age my sister was constantly embattled, my parents have figured it’s not worth it to fight me every step of the way on every aspect of life. Basically, they leave me alone. I desire attention, yet with this additional freedom I flee from their parental grasp, and try to remain independent.

3. Older Sisters Leave— Going from a last child to an only child is quite a conundrum in the family unit. NOW, I resent the attention I subconsciously desired as a little child. Thank God basements were created. I try and hide to not be caught under the newly found spotlight of parenting.

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Last Child Searches for College

14 Oct

After spending several years alone with my two sisters moved out and at college, I’ve attempted to maintain peace, hidden inside my Fortress of Solitude (the basement). However, shockingly it’s almost my turn to move on to college….sort of.

My father, my mother, my uncle, my aunt, my other aunt, my grandmother, my sister, and my other sister, all went, or are currently attending the same university. To my parents, it’s almost inconceivable that I would even desire to go anywhere else. Let’s just say, there is some strong urging.  

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My parents told me they would cover the cost of this college, and that this is the highest they will go. There goes out of state tuition…

I really can’t complain about the school itself; it has most of what I would want, but hey, maybe I have Stockholm Syndrome after attending countless football games and campus activities over the years, as the proud alumni point out their favorite things.

I can remember the long, painful, and migraine inducing arguments between my oldest sister and my parents over where to go, and yet at the last second she revealed she wanted to attend her current school the whole time. My other sister applied early decision. I haven’t heard a word about the discussion.

But being the last child, this is the norm.  Woe is me.